EVOLUTION! SHIIIINKAAA

Yesterday while playing foosball (table soccer) my colleague exclaimed "ARGH WHY CAN'T I BEAT YOU!!!!"

And i replied "BECAUSE YOU PLAY LIKE A DRUNKEN GIRL WITH LEUKAEMIA!"

Then he got all emo and sad. So i decided to shine a light into his heart. "FRET NOT, WEAK ONE! DO YOU KNOW WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN US AND MONKEYS?! HUMANS HAVE THE CAPACITY FOR INFINITE EVOLUTION! SHOW ME HOW YOUR FLOWER CAN BLOSSOM! RISE UP AND DEFEAT ME ONE DAY!"

He then nicely told me to 'fuck off', but i'm sure you get my point here.

TODAY'S TOPIC IS EVOLUTION!

You know i've been secretly eating burning coals everyday. This way, i will probably die early, but my kids will inherit a gene which says 'Shit, hot stuff in mouth burns throat, and burns tummy. We must immunize." THEREFORE MY CHILDREN WILL BE ABLE TO BREATHE FIRE! FUCK YES I AM THE BEST DADDY EVER

Actually thats not the real point of this post. Although i know all of you are pissing your pants thinking of my kids incinerating yours.

I have already evolved!

W-WHAT DID YOU SAY KUANYI?!

Yes, i have already gone through the process of evolution! I am now a higher being!

100% of you are now thinking "bullshit". Well okay, okay. Fine. PROOF! BEHOLD!

Click to View

I didn't even bother saying "Find me in the picture." Because its so damn easy. FIRSTLY, i'm way in front. and at the extreme corner. SECONDLY, there is this huge gap between me and the other kid, which is the first thing you notice in the picture. I found myself there in like 2 seconds.

NOW! YOU LOOK ME IN THE EYE AND TELL ME I HAVEN'T EVOLVED!

I'm stronger, faster, smarter, and above all, i have a better haircut!

W-what? Thats called "growing" and not evolving?!

; _______________ ;

P.s: Thats me in primary one. I look angry because its 2pm and very hot and the sun is scorching my very eyeballs.

P.s2: Of all the fourty kids you see, i only remember roughly... 5. INCLUDING MYSELF.

P.s3: Next time i'll scan my sec 2 yearbook photo!